20 Funny Ways Brits Just Can’t Help Roasting Americans
Ah, Americans. You can hear them before you see them, and you can’t help but both chuckle and cringe at their quirks. With their endearing yet slightly baffling ways, here’s a look at why they keep the rest of the world perpetually amused and occasionally puzzled.
1. Volume Levels
Their inside voice is our shouting at a football match. Subtlety in volume is apparently not an American forte.
2. Unbridled Enthusiasm
Their boundless enthusiasm for the mundane is both bewildering and slightly enviable. “Amazing!” they say, about a sandwich.
3. Super-Sized Everything
If it exists, America has a version that’s three times bigger. Because why have less when you can have more and then some?
4. Tipping Everyone
In America, everyone gets a tip, turning every payment transaction into a math problem.
5. The “World” Series
It’s charming they think “world” means America. Bless.
6. Imperial System
Feet, inches, pounds? The metric system is too mainstream, apparently.
7. Manifest Destiny
American Exceptionalism might be more palatable if it were just slightly less… exceptional.
8. Film Finishes
Every film must wrap up with a neat, happy bow. Because unresolved endings are for Europeans, obviously.
9. Over-Politeness
Their politeness can be so over-the-top it loops right back around to seeming insincere. “Have a nice day!” Sure, but why the pressure?
10. Coffee Orders
Their coffee orders are longer than some of our literature. Ever heard of tea, straightforward and simple?
11. Accents
Their accents turn English into a bold, brash cousin who’s had one too many at the pub. Enthusiastic, but slightly off.
12. Tourist Attire
Their vacation uniform—white sneakers, shorts, and baseball caps. It’s like they dress to be spotted from space.
13. Flag Enthusiasm
Is there a square inch of the moon where they haven’t planted a flag?
14. Fast Food Domination
They’ve exported fast food as if it were gourmet cuisine. Ever tried fish and chips, the proper way?
15. Business Jargon
Their love of corporate jargon could fill a dictionary. Let’s not leverage anything; we’re having tea.
16. Reality Television
Turning life’s every folly into showbiz; because why live a quiet life when you can dramatize it for ratings?
17. Patriotism
It’s just a tad over the top. We like our country too, we just don’t feel the need to sing about it so often.
18. The American Dream
Always striving for happiness can be exhausting from just a spectator’s point of view.
19. The Permanent Smile
That ever-present grin—do their cheeks not ache?
20. They’re Actually Quite Lovely
Perhaps the most frustrating thing is, despite all this, Americans are often genuinely warm and friendly, making it rather difficult to maintain a proper British reserve.
An Affectionate Nod
For all their idiosyncrasies, life would be decidedly duller without our American cousins. Their quirks keep things lively, even if they do baffle the stiff upper lip from time to time. Here’s to enjoying the spectacle!
Banned in the USA: 14 Everyday Items We Can’t Have
Ever feel like America’s rulebook was written by someone with a dartboard? Across the pond or down under, things get even wackier. Let’s take a walk on the wild side of global “Do’s” that are definite “Don’ts” in the Land of the Free. Are you ready to find out just how bizarrely different the world can be? Banned in the USA: 14 Everyday Items We Can’t Have
Gone From the Shelves: Why 18 American Staples Vanished
Over the years, various foods that were once staples in American kitchens have been banned or are no longer allowed to be sold due to health, environmental, or ethical reasons. Here’s a list of 18 such items, detailing why they’ve been pulled off the market. Do you remember any of these? Gone From the Shelves: Why 18 American Staples Vanished
Eat & Drink at Your Own Risk: 20 Foods to Keep Away From Your Family
When it comes to food and drinks, not all choices are created equal. Some items on the shelves are so bad for your health that they’re almost legendary. Here’s a list of some of the absolute worst food and drink products—specific brands included—that you might want to avoid at all costs if you care about your nutritional intake. Eat & Drink at Your Own Risk: 20 Foods to Keep Away From Your Family
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / MilanMarkovic78.
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